The Smarmy Carny

The good news: The National Sex Offender Public Registry is now online.

The bad news:

The National Sex Offender Public Registry Web site is currently unavailable due to heavy demand. Please visit www.nsopr.gov again later or use the following list to search individual state's sex offender registry sites.

The site has displayed this message every time I have checked it during the past couple days. Well, either way, it's worth a bookmark. I'm sure the traffic will clear up at some point.

Either way, I don't care what happens with Michael Jackson. I have always compared him with the problem child who always acts up to get attention. When you're a has-been that has had two huge successes (the Jackson Five, and then the solo career), I guess you just get used to all the attention and fame.

What else could explain some of Jackson's eccentric behavior? Why would you wave your baby around outside a window in front of reporters and cameras?

I'm shocked that there's not a Michael Jackson reality show out there yet.

That dude has issues, and I think the solution is to ignore him. It's the media's fault that we even had to hear about this fodder every day throughout the entire trial.

For a great song dedicated to Michael Jackson, give a listen to Ookla the Mok's "F. People," or at least just read the lyrics.

If the sequined glove does not fit, you must acquit.

Napoleon Dynamite

Who's the better dancer: Napoleon Dynamite, or Fender (from the movie Robots)? You be the judge!

Be sure to check out the "Napoleon vs. Fender Danceoff: Who's got the skills?" site. Watch a couple clips, and be sure to vote!

The Internet Movie Database has some fun facts regarding Napoleon Dyamite, including:

• Every dish shown during the opening credits is eaten by a character later in the movie. The dishes presented in the opening credits were the work of the three people who present them.
• Jon Heder was paid $1,000 to play Napoleon Dynamite. The movie grossed over $40,000,000 in the United States.
• Jon Heder helped to make the boondoggle keychains between scenes.
• Jon Heder credits Tina Majorino (Deb) with helping to choreograph the dance scene. He also states that some of the dance moves were "borrowed" from Michael Jackson, Backstreet Boys, John Travolta, Soul Train, as well as some of his own moves.
• Jon Heder did all of the drawings seen in the film.

My vote goes out to Napoleon Dynamite. He's got skills.

Can you bring me my chapstick?