The Smarmy Carny

Chuck Norris endorses Mike Huckabee in a new YouTube campaign video. In this video, "Chuck Norris Approved," Huckabee gives several Chuck Norris facts and Norris gives various Huckabee facts. The video calls the mash up "HuckChuckFacts." Take a look.

Of course, in order to understand this video, you'd have to be familiar with the various Chuck Norris facts that have been flying around the internet for the past couple years.

The only problem I have with this video is that we've got the humorous Chuck Norris facts combined with actual Mike Huckabee talking points. The writers for this video really should have tried to get Huckabee's talking points across in a humorous manner that would match the Chuck Norris facts.

Thanks to Delirium for bringing this one to my attention.

Just when you thought network TV was about as low as it could get, Hollywood's ineffective and misdirected attempts to push environmental issues this week brought network television to a new low.

NBC celebrated "Green Week" this week. It was one of the oddest campaigns or ratings stunts of television history, all under the motto "Green is Universal" — perhaps a reference to NBC Universal, the company that owns NBC, Universal Studios, and other media companies.

Probably the only successful change is that NBC's "The More You Know" PSAs were environmentally focused. They are, after all, PSAs, so they can easily fit the theme. Granted, the environmental topics pale in comparison to the standard TMYK themes of domestic violence and drug use, but that's no matter.

The worst of Green Week is that NBC has directed their shows to adopt an environmental theme in this week's episode. What this accomplishes is that each show on NBC suddenly creates an awkward, contrived environmental situation. These environmental themes have been shoved into this week's episode, regardless of the episode's plot or the show's season-long plot arc.

• ER — The ER experiences a blackout after an unseasonably hot Chicago Day. Sam spends some time with a conservationist doing an energy usage study on County General and Morris has a run in with door of a Hummer.
• Heroes — The Heroes logo turns green — literally — for the week.
• Life — Charlie randomly decides to purchase a solar farm because of a dream he had.
• My Name Is Earl — The Warden instructs Earl to toss in some environmental teachings into their "scared straight" program.

The silly theme only thrives in silly, random shows that enjoy being silly, random shows like Scrubs and Deal or No Deal. One of the worst examples is My Name Is Earl: The warden randomly orders that Earl insert an environmental theme into their "scared straight" program for young children. Furthermore, the awkward, forced moments degrade the episodes' content and don't do much to increase awareness of any sort. These are theme's we've heard for the past 15 years. I'd expect environmental snippets like this in a children's program, perhaps, but not in programming geared toward adults.

I'd love to see the writers of any show stand up against this theme — not the environmentalism theme, mind you, but the NBC-mandated "Green Week" theme. No wonder the writers are on strike this week.

TV Envy also has a great article on NBC's Green Week this that delves into the subject that is worth the read.

The Power Workers’ Union (an Ontario-based organization) started the "A Better Energy Plan" campaign this summer to warn the public that if coal was removed as a source of power, blackouts would become commonplace.

The campaign included three commercials: "Stoplights," "Elevator," and "Pub."

The commercials aren't really astounding or anything, but "Stoplights" cracks me up every time I see it. "Elevator" really gets the point across, too.

Keep in mind that if you don't find these as entertaining as I did, there's no refunds on the time you wasted.

In April, I wrote about the fact that Casey Sheehan's headstone had not yet been installed, even two years after Casey's death.

Just in time for Memorial Day, Casey's headstone was installed on May 25, 2006. Happily, since Casey's father Patrick took over the task a couple months ago, plans for the headstone finally started in motion and the monument is in now place.

The tombstone reads:

Our Casey
Ever faithful, kind, and gentle, good son, beloved brother, brave soldier, dear friend, you loved your family and lived your life serving others to the end.

On the back of the headstone, there are six symbols, presumably notating six things that Casey enjoyed: The military, the theatre, Eagle Scouts, Superman, Van Halen, and the WWF (World Wrestling Federation).

A picture of the headstone can be seen on the site for Vacaville's The Reporter.

President Bush was literally beside himself during his speech at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, thanks to presidential impersonator Steve Bridges.

It is traditional that the president shows up and delivers a speech lampooning himself. (You might remember Laura Bush's dirty horse joke from last year's dinner.)

The highlight of the speech is a mental run-through of a phrase followed by the actual words uttered by Bush:

Internal President (Bridges): All right. Maintain. Be cool. Let’s give this a try: "We must enhance non-compliance protocols sanctioned not only at IAEA formal sessions, but through intercessional contact."

External President (Bush): “We must enhance non-compliance protocols sanctioned not only at E-I-E-I-O sessions, but through intersexual conduct.”

Casey's grave

As most of us have heard by now, Casey Sheehan, the mechanic from the Army's First Calvary Division, was killed in combat on 4/4/4. The nation is aware of Casey's death due to his mother, Cindy Sheehan, and her continuous anti-Bush, anti-Iraq ranting in the months leading up to and since the 2004 presidential election.

Despite Cindy Sheehan's continual attempts to "memoralize" her son by denouncing the war in Iraq and anything else (war-related or not) that Bush does, Casey Sheehan's gravesite still does not have a tombstone of any sort.

Why would Cindy not put up a tombstone? First, she blamed the mortuary. When the mortuary director came forward and outlined all he had done above and beyond his expected duties (including the standard payment for a tombstone), Cindy seems to have moved on to a different explanation:

For the first year after Casey was killed, I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to place a TOMBstone on my son's grave. I didn't want one more marble proof that my son was dead. I couldn't even call where he was buried a "cemetery," I had to call it "Casey's Park."

Make of that what you will.

This story does have a satisfactory conclusion, though: Cindy's soon-to-be ex-husband, Patrick Sheehan, has taken over this matter, and a local monument company is constructing Casey's permanent headstone.

Update: Casey's headstone was finally installed on May 25, 2006, in time for Memorial Day.

Get more information on Casey's tombstone at Snopes.

Mark Seavey, an Army seargent infantry squad leader recently released due to an injury, stood up to speak at an Arlington, Virginia town hall meeting. Representatives Jim Moran (D-VA) and John Murtha (D-PA) were taking questions at the time.

Take a look at this video. Listen to Seavey's comments on the troops' morale and note Murtha and Moran's reactions to the questions. More importantly, note their responses (or utter lack of response, to be more accurate). The transcription below was first posted over at the Dawn Patrol/Mudville Gazette.

"Yes sir my name is Mark Seavey and I just want to thank you for coming up here. Until about a month ago I was Sgt Mark Seavey infantry squad leader, I returned from Afghanistan. My question to you, (applause)

"Like yourself I dropped out of college two years ago to volunteer to go to Afghanistan, and I went and I came back. If I didn't have a herniated disk now I would volunteer to go to Iraq in a second with my troops, three of which have already volunteered to go to Iraq. I keep hearing you say how you talk to the troops and the troops are demoralized, and I really resent that characterization. (applause) The morale of the troops that I talk to is phenomenal, which is why my troops are volunteering to go back, despite the hardships they had to endure in Afghanistan.

"And Congressman Moran, 200 of your constituents just returned from Afghanistan. We never got a letter from you; we never got a visit from you. You didn't come to our homecoming. The only thing we got from any of our elected officials was one letter from the governor of this state thanking us for our service in Iraq, when we were in Afghanistan. That's reprehensible. I don't know who you two are talking to but the morale of the troops is very high."

Moran - who is one of the few congressmen supporting Charlie Rangel's call to restore the draft - responded quickly: "That wasn't in the form of a question, it was in the form of a statement. But, uhh… let's go over here." And he took the next question.

Thanks to the Dawn Patrol/Mudville Gazette, Michelle Malkin, Tom Segel, and Rush Limbaugh for further propogating the story, else I might never have heard about it. God knows the mainstream media wouldn't latch onto a comment like this. Wait for Bush to mispronounce one word this week, however, and we'll hear all about it.