The Smarmy Carny

Lars Von Triers called our President names and uttered anti-American sentiments. Is anyone surprised?

Mr Bush is an a**hole. So much in Denmark is American. We are a nation under influence.

America fills about 60 per cent of my brain. So, in fact, I am American.

But I can't go there to vote and I can't change anything, because I am from a small country. So that is why I make films about America.

Oh, come on in, Lars. Go ahead. Since you think about America so much, you're allowed to vote in our elections! That's perfectly fine. Of course, if he moved here, he'd probably move to a state with few electoral votes, and then he'd say that he can't change anything because he is from a small state, and that is why he makes films about America.

The entertaining line from this article is that his comments "shocked crowds" at Cannes. I'm not familiar with contactmusic.com, but clearly this author is not very familiar with the movie industry, politics in Cannes, or Lars Von Trier. I'm sure that roughly 0% of the crowd was shocked. Of course, I always wonder how the American actors and directors present react to these comments. Granted, most of the American movie industry are anti-Bush, America-hating celebrities to begin with — especially those who are present at Cannes — so there probably isn't much response from them.

There are plenty of stories about the politicizing of Star Wars Episode III, and I generally scoff at these. I scoff equally at boycotts of such movies.

I just read an article at NYT (shaddap, it was linked from Drudge!) titled "Latest 'Star Wars' Movie Is Quickly Politicized." It discusses the politicizing of the movie before its release. Of course, it attempts to minimize any boycotts of the movie, but at least this time, they are correct.

Regarding this whole debacle, I agree with Peter Sealey, who likened the political interpretations of the movie to a Rorschach test.

Still, there's something of note. The typical Hollywood crowd takes a left turn again, as Lucas makes some DNC Donkey-headed comments:

And just what was Mr. Lucas – who could not be reached for comment Wednesday – thinking when he told a Cannes audience that he had not realized in plotting the film years ago that fact might so closely track his fiction?

Alluding to Michael Moore's remarks about "Fahrenheit 9/11" at Cannes a year earlier, Mr. Lucas joked, "Maybe the film will waken people to the situation."

Apparently in all seriousness, though, he went on to say that he had first devised the "Star Wars" story during the Vietnam War. "The parallels between what we did in Vietnam and what we're doing in Iraq now are unbelievable," he told an appreciative audience.

Spongebob is F. U. N.

The TV Guide folks haven't been paying very close attention. Hopefully they are just lazy at fact-checking. After all, they are just a bunch of couch potatoes.

You may or may not have read some of the articles claiming that Dr. James Dobson (of Focus on the Family) said that SpongeBob SquarePants was a gay character. Dobson never said anything of the sort, of course. As if the usual media slander wasn't enough, even TV Guide jumped in on the game and attacked Dobson. Not only was he jeered in the Cheers & Jeers section, but the listing stands out, thanks to a large picture of SpongeBob punctuating the entry.

Here's an entry in their Cheers & Jeers section:

Jeers to Focus on the Family's founder Dr. James C. Dobson for putting the squeeze on SpongeBob SquarePants. The conservative activist claims the cartoon character promotes a "pro-homosexual" agenda. We always thought sponges were asexual creatures. Maybe Dobson found out about SpongeBob's torrid fling with Tinky Winky.

I frequently feel like writing in and replying to this sort of obfuscation, but I rarely ever do. Generally, others are more than willing to express their opinions and mail them in. This one just pushed the right buttons, though, and I decided that this time I will be one of those "others" willing to express my opinion. Clearly the author and editor(s) of the Cheers & Jeers section wasn't too interested in fact checking this week. I simply had to send in a comment to their Letters department at letters@tvguide.com. I suggest you do the same.

If you're interested in what Dr. Dobson actually said, read his article at family.org about "Setting the Record Straight." Here is an excerpt:

The video, which millions of children will soon see, features nearly 100 favorite cartoon characters that kids will instantly recognize, including not only SpongeBob, but also Barney the Dinosaur, the Muppets, Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, Winnie the Pooh, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Jimmy Neutron and Big Bird. The video itself is innocent enough and does not mention anything overtly sexual. Rather, it features the children's cartoon characters singing and dancing along to the popular disco hit "We Are Family."

But while the video is harmless on its own, I believe the agenda behind it is sinister. My brief comments at the FRC gathering were intended to express concern not about SpongeBob or Big Bird or any of their other cartoon friends, but about the way in which those childhood symbols are apparently being hijacked to promote an agenda that involves teaching homosexual propaganda to children. Nevertheless, the media jumped on the story by claiming that I had accused SpongeBob of being "gay." Some suggested that I had confused the organization that had created the video with a similarly named gay-rights group. In both cases, the press was dead wrong, and I welcome this opportunity to help them get their facts straight.

If you're feeling sadistic, you might then want to read how the media interprets his comments about the video. Typical losers CNN and MSNBC had their say, of course. MSNBC refers to him as "A man named Dr. James Dobson," as if he had never been in the news before, or as if he was some unknown making wild comments. What fun.

SpongeBob isn't gay . . . but that Tinky Winky still freaks me out!

Note: My letter will surely not be published, but I can only imagine that someone's letter on this topic will be printed. I will post it here when that happens. As I mentioned, I suggest you write in as well and voice your opinion at letters@tvguide.com