The Smarmy Carny

An unsuspecting man is pushed into a car containing sleeping badgers that, "if awakened, they'd gnaw his face off. "

The people who pushed him into the car begin to fire cannons off outside the car, but nothing can be heard inside the car: Lucky for him, that car is the Toyota Corolla, which keeps the interior silent from outside noise.

As the man breathes a sigh of relief, his cell phone goes off, awakening the badger. The badger growls in the man's face, and we then move to the car's exterior.

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Toyota's slogan? "Live the dream for less coin."

A job interviewer asks a candidate to talk about himself. As he begins talking, a second voice speaking gibberish cancels out anything the man says. It's clear that the voice is coming from the stain on the man's dress shirt.

The man talks about his organizational skills, his ability to work well in groups, and his success at the company's competitor, but you'd never know it. The commercial is very well produced so that the stain's voice and look make it nearly impossible to focus on the man's words.

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See more at mytalkingstain.com

A man shopping for a car explains to the car salesman that he did all his research on his cell phone with cars.com. He said it was that, or "Plan B".

The salesman asked what Plan B was, and the guy explains, "Oh, I was gonna have you fight Glondor in a stone circle death match."

We then see Glondor, a tattooed hulk of a man, pressing his fists into shards of glass and stepping into a fiery stone circle with the car salesman.

Glondor sounds a barbaric yawp, and the guy strongly suggests to the salesman that he should step out of the circle "to avoid any confusion."

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An office worker impresses his boss by showing him how he was shipping all the company's packages via carrier pigeons equipped with GPS tracking and night vision sensors.

For the large packages, however, he used giant pigeons and robes that almost immediately broke and dropped the packages right into the street, crushing cars. The pigeons then landed, pecking bread from a bread truck, drinking from broken fire hydrants, and causing accidents with feathers.

The boss immediately mandates that they will switch to FedEx.

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In this commercial, a guy shows up with his girlfriend at a wine and cheese party. He is carrying a huge piece of cheese — probably a foot tall and almost as wide.

He takes the cheese into the kitchen, where most of the men are hanging out. As a guy comments on the size of the cheese, the man picks up the faux cheese to reveal a six pack of Bud Light underneath.

Another guy removes the end of his baguette and reveals a bottle of his own and a third guy opens his Chablis wine, which actually houses a mini television.

As they run out of beverages, the guy tells his girlfriend that he is going on "a cheese run."

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This ad starts out with Troy Aikman discussing football as Joe Buck starts dozing off, with his head nodding as he falls out of consciousness a couple times. Haddaway's What is Love? starts playing.

We then see various people nodding off: A guy with a combover at a diner, office workers, valets, cowboys, and nominees for "Song of the Year" award at a music awards ceremony (Busta Rhymes, LL Cool J, Macy Gray, and Missy Elliott). More people are nodding off: sheep shearers, Japanese restaurant workers, "Galacticon" convention geeks, a bobblehead factory worker, a game show contestant, and a father pushing his daughter on a swing, a trucker, and an auto mechanic. During the commercial, the father is sent flying as his daughter swings back and nails him across the playground, the auto mechanic doesn't awake to see that the has lifted a car up into a metal bar, and the diner man nods off into his soup.

Finally, an office worker pushes in a cart filled with Diet Pepsi Max. The office workers take a healthy gulp and are suddenly energized. Their sleepy head nodding suddenly turns into head bobbing to What is Love, a la A Night at the Roxbury. We see the various characters bobbing their heads now.

The true punchline of the commercial comes when Chris Kattan enters the scene, notices the head bobbing, and yells, "STOP IT!!!" at the people doing the head-shaking dance. Of course, Kattan popularized the movement with Will Ferrell in the Saturday Night Live sketches that inspired the movie A Night at the Roxbury.

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At the end of the commercial, an obnoxious voice yells, "Wake up, people!"

For this ad, Audi reworks the classic "horse head in the bed" scene to sell their cars.

As the commercial opens, we see an exterior shot of a house followed by a pan in on Moe Greene (played by Alex Rocco) sleeping in bed. Just like in The Godfather, we see him stir and notice the stains in his bed.

Moe looks at his hands and sees the dark fluid. He throws back the covers to reveal — not a sawed off horse head, but the sawed off front end of a car. The dark liquid was not horse blood, but motor oil.

We then see the exterior of the house again, with the Audi R8 and its neat-looking running lights.

The message: This is the death of old luxury.

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For more on the Audi R8, check out TruthinEngineering.com